Radio to die for
Non – UK readers must forgive me. I write this as I listen to Mark Tulley’s “Something Understood” on BBC Radio 4. It’s a programme so depressing that suicide would seem a merciful release, if the alternative was to have to listen to it for more than about one hour. Bloody hell: Tully’s even put on a piece by Benjamin Brittan, sung by that dreadful Peter Pears. Before “Something Understood” , the most depressing radio show was, undoubtably, “Sing Something Simple“, which used to come on the Light Programme/ Radio 2: if you’ve never heard it, consider yourself lucky. It involved a choir singing depressing songs by Steven Foster and others, accompanied by Jack Emblow’s accordian. Someone said: “hearing ‘Sing Something Simple’ was the first time I realised that – one day – I would die”.
The Archers, You and Yours, and anything on BBC Radio 4 that purports to be “comedy” are also on my list of worst-ever radio. But the ultimate prize must surely go to the late, unlamented Home Truths: surely the most twee, self-satisfied, middle class vomit ever to be broadcast. If you heard it, you’ll know exactly what I mean: posh people giggling about going to the toilet and/or farting. Bring back the drunken bloke who did “The Fleet’s Lit Up!”, I say.
As I said, overseas readers must forgive me (although you can get Radio 4, if you try: some of it is quite good!): I had to get this off my chest. Radio 4 is a bit like Public Service radio in the US, except it’s paid for by a universal licence charge. And the awfulness of certain Radio 4 programmes has driven me over to BBC Radio 3 (the “classical music” channel), thus educating me in Shostakovich, Stravinsky and Schoenberg.
On the plus side, BBC radio introduced me, as a kid – over steamy Sunday lunches – to the wonders of Tony Hancock, Kenneth Horne and…Julian and Sandy: anyone remember them?
Shiraz Socialist 
David119 said,
January 13, 2013 at 10:42 pm
I’m not sure if “Something Understood” is depressing but it is certainly pretentious, sanctimonious and extremely irritating. With the exception of the truly dreadful 6.30 “comedy” slot, “Something Understood” must be in line for the worst Radio 4 programme ever. Saint Mark Tulley clearly thinks his droning on provides him with guaranteed wings in the hereafter. But my idea of hell would be being forced to listen to an entire episode. I dread waking up too early on Sunday morning or suffering from insomnia at night.
martin ohr said,
January 14, 2013 at 11:31 am
I had the same conversation with my wife yesterday. I despise this programme, in particular because it’s scheduled to catch me at the start and end of sunday, I often end up hearing it twice. It wasn’t ulley last night, but some genuine god-botherer. The the theme as usual was something ethereal ‘lasting beauty’ or somesuch. As usual none of the music(except Vaughn Williams – whose estate I assume must sponsor the programme such is his prevalence) or poetry or book readings was terrible, just put together in the most tedious and uninspiring way.
I like to imagine that Julian Treslove is based on Tulley. As far as I recall, Treslove quits his job at the BBC because he finds it is making even him depressed and bored.